| When my wife became pregnant we sold my '90 NA in order to reduce the financial load after she quit her job to raise our son. I did maintain thoughts/dreams of getting another Z32 down the road which I ultimately did 11 years ago. I did buy a junky 240Z to bridge the gap but that car was essentially a means to keep a Z in the family while not costing me an arm and a leg each month. Ultimately, about a year after I got the 240Z, it was relegated to storage-shelf status in the garage while I drove something that was more practical and reliable. This was a mutual decision we made as a couple because she was giving up her career while I "merely" had to give up my Z. However, during the time that I had the NA and even after I got the TT there was still a need to be cautious and not to let things get too one-sided in terms of time and money. When my wife got pregnant, she had to suspend her activities riding horses. However, like the Z for me, she's gotten back into horses as our boys got older. With both of our hobbies, we've had a playful rule that whatever one spends on his/her hobby, the other gets to spend an equal amount on theirs. It helped keep things in check with the knowledge that if she wanted to buy a $750 saddle she was, in effect, spending $1500 because I would be able to spend $750 on my Z. And the same applied to me for Z-related expenditures. Taking the POV of Travis' wife, I would like to speak to her defense for a moment. I've been in the same boat that she is likely in. In my case, my wife's passion for animals (horses in particular) had gone over the top at one point and I felt very similar to how his wife probably feels in that I basically hated any horse-related activities because it consumed so much of her time, our money, etc... It almost came to the breaking point and I thought our marriage might end. I put it to her bluntly that a decision needs to be made as we cannot afford (emotionally and financially) to keep going down the path we were on. It got to this point because either I wasn't communicating my feelings/concerns properly, or she wasn't listening. I suspect Travis' wife may be feeling frustrated for similar reasons and it's reached a boiling point for her such that she cannot feel any passion for his hobby. It takes compromise on both sides of the relationship and we do not know what consessions Travis' wife has made already. Even though I interpret some of the "sell the wife", "tell her the way it is", and so on to be somewhat tongue-in-cheek, I think it's not fair to take that position without knowing her side (note to Travis: I am not advocating that you bring all of this up on the website here.) BTW - in my case: did I tell my wife to sell all of the horses? No. Did I ask her to set some reasonable time and financial limits? Yes. It was a conversation that we both needed to have but due to timing and other distractions, we almost waited until it was too late to put our cards on the table and look for a mutually beneficial solution. If Travis has exhausted all means of approaching the situation in this manner and his wife is still not willing to give any ground, then they need to take this up with a professional who can help them out. Dave
This car is probably owned by a snowboarder. Sig Quotes: "I JUST saw your polls post" email from BigTDogg on March 24, 2009 in reference to this polls post from Jan 7, 2009. "Your sausage scares me!" - TT-XTZ 6/13/05 "Or he's having a rough week like the rest of us and decided to take out his agressions of not being breast fed on me." BigTDogg 15:45, 09/25/03 "Pick her up from day care and take her to Dairy Queen for a snow cone." YugoBernie 1/7/04 of course those are canadian bannings and beatings, which after the conversion rate is really only a "hey! stop that!" Chris(NJ) 1/14/04 see the green "n" next to my name? what's COZ? (n/m) - 300zx88 8/11/04 |
